Breaking News from

Election Commission of India had announced today that the General Elections are to be moved outside India due to security reasons. They are exploring the possibility of shifting the elections to Canada or Malaysia and are already in talks with those respective governments. It is learnt that China and North Korea also seem to have offered a helping hand.

Meanwhile, this announcement had stunned all political parties and are left to scramble with not enough time. Regional parties are said to be checking with the international airlines about the possibility of bringing additional suitcases as hand luggage.

Political parties in south are a step ahead in this process and claimed that they have already reserved the walls of major buildings in Canada and Malaysia and are rushing special representatives to scribble their party initials on those walls.

Association of kodumbaavi (effigy) manufacturers have condemned this decision and are planing to burn the kodumbaavi of Election Commission itself to express their protest!

நக்கலூர் நட்டு

1) குற்றம் செய்ய தூண்டுகிறார்: கருணாநிதி , திமுக காயப்படுத்தியதால் அதிமுக கூட்டணி - ராமதாஸ் [பேஷ் பேஷ் இக்கரைக்கு அக்கரை பச்சை!]

2) எனக்கு பதவி ஆசை இல்லை: அன்புமணி: [அட உங்கக்காமக்கா இம்புட்டு நாள் தெரியாம போச்சே.!..]

3) தொகுதி பங்கீடு ஜெயலலிதா முடிவு செய்வார்: வைகோ [அட! பின்ன நீங்களா முடிவு பண்ணுவிங்க?]

4) தி.மு.க. அணிக்கு பா.ம.க. வரவேண்டும்: திருமாவளவன் [இவரு கட்சியே ஊசல் ஆடுது]

5) ஒரு சீட் மட்டும் தந்தால் ஏற்க முடியாது - மனித நேயக் கட்சி [யாருங்க இவக..?]

Jai Ho, Congress Version

Take a super hit song, suck out everything fun about it, redo it with bland vocals and show a montage of clips that don't really show you in a good light.... presenting "Jai Ho", the Congress version.

Wonder who thinks former PM Shastri is a stamp of approval for the current Congress Party.

Follow the American Model

With the age of globalization, Indians elections are also now influenced by the US. So, the burger-eating, halloween celebrating masses in India can hope to see these headlines in this election:

1. Congress spokesperson accuses Advani of relying too much on the teleprompter.

2. The age debate: An old, frail 82 year old Advani or a young, dynamic 77 year old Manmohan Singh?

3. New revelation that Vajpayee's middle name is actually "Never bin laden". Nonetheless, Congress uses this to attack Advani.

4. CNN-IBN to have a hologram of Rajdeep Sardesai hosting the election results (even though he is right in the next room).

5. Namitha enters politics as the vice-prime ministerial candidate. Gives an interview to NDTV where she claims she was chosen for this role because she could see Pakistan from her backyard. Critics label her "Dolly Parton Barbie".

6. Andhra Pradesh is labelled by the media as a swing state. On hearing this, Chiranjeevi quickly promises to give free swings to all voters.

7. Rediff hosts a virtual debate between Advani and Manmohan Singh. Debate ends prematurely when Advani's reply is overshadowed by Rediff personals ads, and the host mistakenly reads a "Make money at home" spam comment.

இன்னும் ஒரு முடிவும் எடுக்கலே-கார்த்திக்

பாஜக தான் தனக்கென ஒரு அணியை உருவாக்க தீவிரமாக முயன்று வருகிறது. இந்த அணியில் அகில இந்திய சமத்துவ மக்கள் கட்சி இடம் பெறுகிறது. கூடவே கார்த்திக்கின் அகில இந்திய நாடாளும் மக்கள் கட்சியும் இணையும் என்கிறார்கள்.

இதுகுறித்து கார்த்திக் கூறுகையில், எங்களது நிலை குறித்து பத்திரிகைகளில் ஏதேதோ செய்திகள் வருகின்றன. ஆனால் நாங்கள் இன்னும் முடிவே எடுக்கவில்லை. 29ம் தேதி திருப்பூரில் எங்களது கட்சியின் பொதுக்குழுவைக் கூட்டியுள்ளேன். அங்குதான் முடிவெடுப்போம். முடிவெடுத்ததும் ஏப்ரல் 1ம் தேதி நானே சென்னையில் கூட்டணி குறித்து அறிவிப்பேன். அன்றே தேர்தல் அறிக்கையும் வெளியிடப்படும்.

ஏப்ரல் ஒண்ணாம் தேதி முட்டாள்கள் தினம். பார்த்து தான் சொல்லியிருக்காரு நம்ம கார்த்திக்.

14 தொகுதிகளில் வெற்றி கிடைக்கலாம் என்று கண்டறிந்துள்ளோம். அதில் 7 தொகுதிகளில் கண்டிப்பாக வெற்றி கிடைக்கும். மற்றவற்றில் பிறரின் வெற்றிகளை நாங்கள் நிர்ணயிக்கும் சக்தியுடன் உள்ளோம்.

சொல்றது தான் சொல்றீங்க.. எதுக்கு 14? மிச்சம் 26 தொகுதியையும் எதுக்கு விட்டு வைப்பானேன்?

எப்படி இருந்தாலும், சன் டிவி காமெடி சானலுக்கு விவேக்கும் வடிவேலுவும் எவ்வளவு முக்கியமோ, ஹாட் மச்சி ஹாட்டுக்கு கார்த்திக் அவ்வளவு முக்கியம். அதுக்காகவே எங்க ஓட்டு உங்களுக்கு உண்டு. (வோட்டு போட ஏசி ரூம் கிடைக்குமா?)

We are back

Hot Machi Hot is back. Looks like there is an election brewing. Hmm.... things are going to get interesting!

Kannum Kannum Nokia

Motorola plant came to Sriperambudhur thanks to my action” says Jayalalitha. She alleges Maran for trying to steal the glory away from her and deny her the credit for her actions and presents evidences to prove her point. If she is speaking the truth, then the credit goes to her. Maran is known for his unethical ways already. Expect announcements highlighting some vague technicalities with which he will claim credit once again. If there is nothing to claim he will surely at least belittle the effort, for sure.

That said, Surprise! Surprise! Rabi Bernard has joined AIADMK party. After playing his role as court jester in Jaya TV he has at last officially joined the party. Why would he do that? Expect some plump role for him in the political arena. I wish I had patience to hear him speak. Even though his flow of thought is nice and analytical his flow of words is too slow for my hearing/listening pleasure that I loose interest by the time he has finished the first sentence.

As predicted earlier, Vijayakanth has announced his party’s interest in joining the race in the Madurai bye election. Best wishes to him. Some sections of the media have already started dissing him and accusing him of being another ADMK/DMK. See report.

Tailpiece… Veerapan is being replaced by others in the forests of Sathy, hunting down Wild elephants and plundering Sandal wood trees. I wish the power heads at Chennai look into this and stop it right now.

Oomai VizigaL !!!

If there is any positive signs in Tamil Nadu politics it is the signals coming from the Vijayakanth camp. Aprt from the news about the enrollment of some MDMK elements into the party recently Vijaykanth's party has been displaying strong signals of sanity in conduct.

Some of his recent announcements were
1. That he does not have to be in the assembly all the time and he will be attending it on any day when improtant business is conducted. (I have no qualms about this because as a new comer with great expectations, he better not learn all the ways of improper conduct. In fact the lesser , the better)

2. DMK has to stop thumping hte table ( He is very dignified in saying this. I would add, stop inviting ADMK for a fight, stop using weapons etc ... etc...)
3. We may consider tie up with other parties for the municipal election. (Well this is debatable. To stand alone or tie up is a big question not only for him but for all the tamil speaking good world - Tamil koorum nallulagam) But let him try it this time and see how it works. Better in municipal election than assembly or central.
4. He has started a tour around the state to mobilise his party and stir up support for the assembly election. This is very positive and will surely reap big benefits. Without grass root support his party would also become like Lok Paritran. Another positive move. He has already started the tour from Kanyakumari without much fanfare. May be could not afford much fanfare but he should know that it does not matter for the public ultimately. If intentions are good then any action is deemed to be postive and so will its outcome be. So no worry there.
5. Only one movie a year. Come on. I know this is a stale joke but , it is still a good news. One movie is OK with me.

So what more could happen?

With the seat at Madurai vacated by the sudden demise of PTR Palanivalrajan, I think his party should contest there. It would be a tough fight but he can get it if he concentrates. I know it is a bit too early to announce anything in this regard lest he be eqauted to a vulture but I think there is no harm in making the plans without any formal announcements.

What says you?

Teacher ! Teacher!

The Vaitheegan Show [#14]

ஜாதிகள் இல்லையடி பாப்பா....
May 31st will be remembered as a Red letter day in the annals of Tamil Nadu Assembly history as on this date the House adopted four important Bills," claimed our Chief Minister பட்றுதலை ராவணன், oops Mu. Karunanidhi on Wednesday. The chief minister of TamilNadu also managed to excavate the good old “cast” mummy - gave his usual caste based political speech. He said in the past, when some opposition members described the government headed by him as "third rate" (`moondram thara') government, he had corrected them saying his rule was "fourth rate" (`nangam thara') i.e. `Shudras' rule. His reply was commended by E.V.R., who was alive then. In the `Varnashrama dharma,' there are four categories viz. Brahmins, Kshatriyas, Vysyas and Shudras. He also urged the center to implement OBC quote. He took a pot shot at people from north India, it seems they felt ashamed to call themselves backward class communities, in Tamil Nadu people were proud to identify themselves with the BCs [தமிழா தமிழா பாவமடா நீ]

The Bills adopted by the House are: making Tamil compulsory in all schools from classes 1 to 10; providing reservation for Backward Classes, Scheduled Castes and Scheduled Tribes in self-financing colleges in the State; withdrawal of TESMA [now government employees can come to work as they like, Strike as they like, just have a ball in the name of government employment] and repeal of Anti-Conversion Act.

After hearing his speech DMK, MLAs in the name of applauding broke about 50-60 desks, while pathetic looking Congress MLA joined them in the banging ceremony. Chief Minster later assured Government would bear the cost of broken benches.

SunTV for its part reported that Tamilnadu now has about 69% reservation in all colleges and schools regardless of being private or funded by Government.

Jayalalitha for her speech quota called this day as black day of Tamil Nadu Assembly history. She accused the speaker of house that he tactfully avoided her from discussion. Apart from the speaker, she also accused the DMK government for the traffic signals that had red light when ever she drives through fort St. George area. At the end of the day both the leaders maintained the Dravidian culture. Ayya called it Red day while Amma called it Black day.

குடி மகனே!...பெரும் குடி மகனே!
Here are some Liquor sales figures given in the House by Chief Minister Karunanidhi
cases in lakhs  2003-04 2004-05 2005-06
Mohan Breweries  54.33 35.47 30.03
Siva distilleries  53 40 43.86
Balaji distilleries  44.9 45.72 50.19
Midas Golden dist  12.85 28.68 51.04
Over all   165.08  149.87  175.12
Tamilnadu குடி மக்கள் had reduced drinking habits in 2004-05. However Midas using their political clout doubled their sales, but some how Balaji distilleries sales also increased. Over all Tamilnadu has been drinking a lot.
175,00,000 cases a year. That’s a lot of Booze. psst:Will Chief Minster provide us details on how much Sumagali cable made on settop boxes alone while how much its competitors made?....ஆடிய ஆட்டம் என்ன...

He closed his speech by stating - There were 122 promises in the Dravida Munnetra Kazhagam manifesto. There were announcements on 68 so far. The remaining would be taken up in phases, he added. அட அரசியல்ல இது எல்லம் சகஜம்ப்ப....[HotMachiHot has sent a search party to find the 60 other announcements - announcement is different from implementation – ]

JJ's Flip Flop

On the first day of the TN assembly session, AIADMK members lead by Paneerselvam (the then leader of opposition) created such a ruckus that they had to be evicted en masse. 60 of the 61 were gone. JJ did not attend the session that day.

Everyone had been guessing whether JJ will follow Mu. Ka. by sitting at home for 4 years and doing enormous disservice to their constituents who chose him/her. JJ stunned the public and the press by storming into the assembly and literally taking over the session. She could have easily sat at home and refused to come to the asssembly alleging possible physical abuse. But she did not care. And that too when none of her people were around she dared to take her position. Her experience and public speaking skills came in handy in her defense of the past government and the public sighed in relief at the victory of democracy. Her victory at the floor probably encouraged her to take over the role of the opposition leader from Pannerselvam – her permanent stand by.

Now, anybody with a sane mind would not let such an opportunity slip. But, JJ? She is different. She never went to the floor the next day. Almost all of her MLA’s were waiting at the gates to cheer her up. But – no show. What kind of a plan was that, you would think. But JJ had more plans. She called in the press and told them that she was not invited to speak in the assembly against the norm. How can anybody asked to speak when they were not even present? If she wanted to make a case she should have gone there, warmed the bench and then cried that she did not get her time. What she chose to do was plain political maneuvering.

Unfortunately this time she fell on her face with this trick. I hope that after the nose bleed has stopped she will not get up more furious but step back and look and what tripped her feet instead. He has to keep in mind that she still hold a huge chunk of the assembly members and millions of voters are expecting her to be a bit more responsible.

Remembering Anna’s word “Kadamai, Ganniyam, Kattupaadu” is the need of the hour for her. It has been so for quite a while now.

Quick Takes

1. The "Free TVs" that DMK government is going to give are going to be Fourteen inch TVs. Just 14 inches? Who would want to see their favorite serials in such a small TV?

2. Dinakaran and TamilMurasu have started featuring full-page ads by Government agencies. inimEl koNdaattam thaan ivanga raajjiyaththilE.

3. Karunanidhi said " There were 122 promises in the Dravida Munnetra Kazhagam manifesto. There were announcements on 68 so far. The remaining would be taken up in phases". - The Hindu. Vaitheegan, can you cross-check?

4. Students from rural areas get 15% of seats reserved in Engineering Colleges, according to Karunanidhi. If rural students are those from Panchayats and urban students are those from Corporations, what about students from Municipalities? :)))

The Vaitheegan Show [#13]

Without any political ethics, Jayalalithi called the DMK chief a Ravana after the elections. Finally the title has been accepted by the DMK chief yesterday, PTI reports, I am an "affectionate" Ravanan says DMK chief . I am not a Pathu Thalai Ravanan, (ten-headed "demon" king Ravanan in Ramayan), but a pattruthal ulla Ravanan (affectionate Ravanan)," Chief Minister Karunanidhi said on Tuesday.So over all the Ravanvan title still holds good, Ravana was also a staunch Siva devotee, a Venna artists and had a kind of weakness for the opposite sex. Who is Kumbakarnan? K Anbazhagan? Vaitheega dai adanguda...

No more special treatment for VIPs in TN temples: Chennai, May 25 (PTI): The practice of giving special treatment to VIPs in temples would be abolished in Tamil Nadu, Chief Minister M Karunanidhi announced in the State Assembly today. Does this law really server any purposes. Most of the so called VIPs in Tamil Nadu don't seem to believe in God, most don't go to a temple. It is only common man who goes to temple. However to make this law really effective, Can we expect our Chief ministers to pass similar law to abolish special treatment of VIPs in Airports, Train stations, Shopping centers, Roadways, High courts, TV coverages, movie theaters, any other place where they zoom pass common man. This law is something similar to a setting up a special counter in a Ration shop for VIPs. tell me which Vip goes to a Ration Shop? What is the point in the passing such worthless law which servers no purpose. Will the Economy thrive because of this law.??? Finance minister who is on a vacation tour to Tamil nadu has to explain.

Jaya misled Assembly: Chidambaram Accusing AIADMK supremo Jayalalithaa of providing wrong information in the State Assembly, Union Finance Minister P Chidambaram on Sunday asserted that the free bicycle scheme launched by the previous AIADMK Government was a centrally-funded scheme. SunTV reported that Chidambaram has said that Jayalalitha attending the session all alone is not an act of courage., what ever, The current chief minister was paid sitting at home for being in the opposition. He never took a trip which he is supposed to do, will Mr. Finance comment on it??

Do you know - Statistics Minister Ko Si Mani had participated in a "yaga" organised by Kanchi seer Jayendra Saraswathi at Kumbakonam. Wow!It that true, do we have a statistics ministry??

Free land Distribution scheme: Here are some statistics let me mislead people a little. According to "statistics" there are 86 lakh landless farmers in the state. A rough calculation says government needs 1,72,00,000 Acres of lands which is about 26,875 square mile. Size of Tamil nadu is about 50,215 sq miles - hence note it - about - 50% of Tamil Nadu will be given away free. More over, existing data from Tamil Nadu Government web sites reads - Total Cultivated Area (Hectare): 58,89,069 - Convert this to square miles - 22,737sqmi, already about 50% of Tamil nadu is agricultural land. Blow it a little more, Coming to the Irrigation part, we picked data from Tamil nadu Government website - 30,87,108 Hectors are irrigated that is, 11,919Sqmi have perennial water supply and the rest 10,818 Sq-Miles depends Kunakudi Vaithiyanathan's Amurthavarshani [KVA]. Tamil nadu will be adding another 27,000sqmi to this KVA equation, where will the irrigation supply come from? The person who went to the Kanchi mutt yaga - "the Statistics minister" has to answer.

The two-week-old minority government of the DMK in Tamil Nadu is under pressure from the Congress to share power with them.The minority government of the DMK required the support of 22 MLAs. Congress, a coalition partner in the government, had offered unconditional support to DMK. But now, a section of the party has put up posters in Chennai making their demand loud and clear. Congress is such an animal, the Head does not seem to know or care what the Tail wants to do or doing. Tail acts as though it is the head and yap around,until head takes over again. Really an amazing Animal, need to call 1800 Animal planet.

Tamil nadu Congress wants DMK to setup an aeronautical institute in memory of Rajiv Gandhi.Congress Whip Peter S Alphonse said that Rajiv Gandhi had been a pilot before he joined politics. In memory of the departed leader, aeronautical science should be taught free of cost to youngsters and they should also be given free training to become pilots, Alphonse said. Congress high command is busy waging a war using Caste politics to gain political milege, Tamil nadu congress came up with a joke. They requested DMK that Ambedkar's birthday be declared officially "Caste Eradication" day, in honour of the leader, who fought for eradicating caste feelings among Indians.

ஞாபகம் வருதே...ஞாபகம் வருதே....

Jayalalitha: Attending the house a day after all her party MLAs were suspended following the furore in the house, the former Chief Minister said the DMK's promise of two acres of land to the landless poor could not be implemented as that much of wasteland was not available with the Government.

Chief Minister M Karunanidhi, who intervened, said that the Government had not said that it would distribute Government land to the poor and clarified that the wasteland included those belonging to private parties.

Jayalalitha: The AIADMK supremo said most of the private wasteland belonged to poor farmers and wanted to know whether their land would be grabbed by the Government.

Chief Minister M Karunanidhi said those wastelands belonging to the poor would be converted into cultivable lands and given back.

Finance Minister, K Anbazhagan, said "the Government has not announced that it would distribute land to all the landless poor. We have only said that the available wasteland would be converted into cultivable land and distributed among the poor landless

ஞாபகம் வருதே...ஞாபகம் வருதே.... This is what DMK manifesto [#15] says
15. Assignment of 2 acres of land to the landless poor families

-- Vaitheegan.

Farm loans waiver

The Hindu has an article where it raises pertinent questions on the Farm loans waiver.

Cooperative bank officials here said that unless the Government comes out with concrete guidelines, it would be difficult to implement the loan waiver scheme.

For example in Dharmapuri district the bank had issued loans on ghost coverages. The local officials did not make crop verification nor cross verification of land holdings at the time of issue of loans. Loans had been issued for crops like banana and turmeric inlands where it was not possible to raise such crops in these area. Cases had been registered against farmers concerned for misleading the bank and disciplinary proceedings had been initiated against officials for issuing loans without making proper enquiry.


The officials said while the loan of farmers who could not repay due to successive droughts in the State could be written off, the scheme should not be extended to those who had "cheated the banks" by making bogus claims or taken loans through fictitious names.
Similarly the officials also wanted to know how the government was going to compensate honest borrowers who had been prompt in repaying the loan. They said the honest borrowers should be rewarded for repaying the loan in time. If the Government decided to reimburse the amount, then it had to allot Rs. 500 crore more under the scheme.

Meanwhile, the repayment of loans by farmers had come to a standstill affecting the financial position of the many PACBs in the State. Seventy per cent of the advances made by these banks were from their own funds. If the government did not reimburse the loan amount to the PACBs at the earliest, many banks had no other alternative but to suspend their operations. With the kuruvai season beginning from the second week of June, farmers, especially small and marginal farmers required bank loans for their farm operations. At least for advancing loans to farmers, the government should compensate the PACBs at the earliest, the officials added.

Interesting points.

I think people who've been honest enough to repay their loans promptly should get an incentive, rather than get nothing. May be they should be allowed easier approvals the next time they get a loan.

About whether those who got the loans by fraudulent means should be compensated, the issue is more tricky. For people who are convicted as frauds, the government shouldn't give back anything. But, for people against whom there are active cases going on, if the government holds back the loan amount, it will amount to assuming guilt without proving.

That said, if people actually got loans by cheating, shouldn't there be a disciplinary action against the officer who approved the loan without doing his due diligence first?