Follow the American Model

With the age of globalization, Indians elections are also now influenced by the US. So, the burger-eating, halloween celebrating masses in India can hope to see these headlines in this election:

1. Congress spokesperson accuses Advani of relying too much on the teleprompter.

2. The age debate: An old, frail 82 year old Advani or a young, dynamic 77 year old Manmohan Singh?

3. New revelation that Vajpayee's middle name is actually "Never bin laden". Nonetheless, Congress uses this to attack Advani.

4. CNN-IBN to have a hologram of Rajdeep Sardesai hosting the election results (even though he is right in the next room).

5. Namitha enters politics as the vice-prime ministerial candidate. Gives an interview to NDTV where she claims she was chosen for this role because she could see Pakistan from her backyard. Critics label her "Dolly Parton Barbie".

6. Andhra Pradesh is labelled by the media as a swing state. On hearing this, Chiranjeevi quickly promises to give free swings to all voters.

7. Rediff hosts a virtual debate between Advani and Manmohan Singh. Debate ends prematurely when Advani's reply is overshadowed by Rediff personals ads, and the host mistakenly reads a "Make money at home" spam comment.

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